If The Shoe Fits

Liesl, 7N

I haven't been shoe shopping in weeks. I am feeling a little weak and pale from the lack of time under shoe store lighting. Some people need sunshine; I need bad overhead spotlights.

I have to report a crime against humanity. This makes me sad to report because it involves one of my dearest friends, Shelley. Shelley is fortunate enough to have a mother in law who gives her truly fabulous shoes. The latest shoes she gave Shelley were some Prada thigh high python boots. Can you imagine? I think I just teeteed a little at the thought. All I get from my mother in law are pajama bottoms from Target. But I'm not bitter. Much.

OK, back to the crime: Shelley's MIL has given her Dior and Chanel and Prada. While Shelley and I were shopping a few weeks ago she told me that, and here is the crime, she never wears them. I'm queasy.

What other more horrific crime is there? Having those fabulous pieces of art and letting them get dusty in your closet?? And the worst part? She's considering selling the python boots on ebay! Tears where streaming down my face when she told me that last fact. I had to gently place the Pliners I was holding down and run screaming from the store. The store owner called the police who wanted to arrest Shelley for her crime, but she managed to convince them to let her remain at large. Something about borrowing something starting with an M and ending with an O. Who knew the police were so corrupt in Dallas?

I'm not sure my friendship with Shelley will survive this blow. I think I might have to take a xanax before I see her next in case she decides to tell me she pawned some Louboutins. Or, some Weitzmans were shoved in between her Candys and Keds. oops, here comes the queasiness again.

A crime against fabulous shoes is a crime against humanity.

Today's favorite shoe:

Charles, by Charles David "Mini"