If The Shoe Fits

Liesl, 7N

Yay! Suz is back! I believe this blog lacks something when she is not able to post as often. We often disagree on shoes which makes for a richer blog experience. Now if I can just get her to say no to Led Zeppelin...

Spring is here! I have been walking around in my new sandals for several days and feeling like I have been set free. As much as I love boots I miss the carefree days of summer and spring and the freedom of the air on my tootsies. With spring I feel the need to remind everyone that it is imperative to start getting pedicures. I get them all year round but I don't expect everyone else to be as vigilant. I would like to do a refresher of the pedicure/sandals rules.

1. A french manicure on your toes looks ridiculous. It is made to mimic the way our idealized fingernails would look if they were perpetually clean and young and long. Who wants to mimic long nails on your toes? That's just gross.
2. Don't wear pink shoes with red nail polish on your toes. They clash and cause the rest of us to have momentary confusion over who you are... scintillating seductress or immaculate innocent. the combination of the two is disturbing and results in an immaculate seductress who confuses everyone.
3. If thy nail polish chips, thou shalt repaint. Always.
4. Smelly feet do not belong in sandals. Ever.
5. If the sandals you are wearing have a huge flower on it, it is way out of fashion. Way, way, way out.
6. Flip flops are for the pool or beach, not lunch with the ladies.
7. After wearing sandals all day remember that your feet will get dirty. It's best to wash them before you get into bed.
8. Slides that flip up when you walk should make minimal sound. Otherwise, it sounds like you are walking along gently farting with each step.
9. Band aids and sandals do not go together. No one wants to see a loose band aid flapping around underneath your sandal or hanging off the side of your foot. Ew.
10. The most important rule: No Crocs, ever. I realize they have flip flops and you might be tempted to wear them to the pool or beach, but they should not be worn. Can you imagine all of that sand in the holes? Crunchy!

I hope this refresher has been informative. Remember to tip your pedicurist and to treat her well; she deals with the most important part of your body, the part that gets to wear the portable art that we call shoes.

If you walk into a pedicure salon wearing Crocs and the women who work there are predominantly "foreign," assume they're laughing at you in their native language.

Today's favorite shoe:

Anne Klein