Liesl, 7N

I am extremely and irretrievably offended. I feel like my honor has been trampled upon and my name is now as muddy as a country doctor who hides an assassin in bad shoes. What, you ask, could cause this ultimate offense? There is a loafer named Liesl. And darlings, let me tell you, it is not good.

Of all the shoes they would name Liesl, they chose that monstrosity?? Look at the stitching! Look at the material! That shoe does not deserve my name. I heartily object to my name being anywhere near that shoe and I think we need to start a petition to rename it. Let's say, something like... Mabel? or how about Agnes? Lucretia? Here's the problem: I can't find out who makes this very un-fabulous loafer. Anyone?

My name is worth far more than cheap materials and bad stitching.

Today's favorite shoe:

Givenchy "574936"

Liesl, 7N

I had the worst nightmare I've ever had last night. I had gone to see my doctor and he told me that I had to start wearing orthopedic shoes. I was excited at first, thinking, new shoes! When he took me to the back wall of his office and showed me the shoes, I shook my head, screamed no, and started to have a panic attack. The shoes were a cross between running shoes, men's oxfords and cardboard boxes. My doctor told that I would lose my ability to walk if I didn't wear these shoes. In other words, my life was well and truly over.

I haven't been able to shake the feelings from that nightmare this morning. The horror of seeing the abomination they were calling a shoe and the agony of hearing that I would have to wear it... it is too much for my fragile psyche. In the dream, I chose the wheelchair over the horrific shoes. Naturally.

Life isn't worth living in bad shoes. You present yourself to the world in your shoes and if you don't care enough to present yourself as fabulous, you might as well resign yourself to mediocrity. And who wants that?

If dreams were reality I'd be Christian Louboutin's best friend and all the world would be better for it.

Today's favorite shoe:

Alessandro Dell'Acqua "719032A"

Liesl, 7N

Did you watch Tuesday's Oprah? You seriously missed it, if not. She was supposed to have on Christian Louboutin but he came down with bronchitis. Instead, she had on one of his representatives and, more importantly, his shoes. I whimpered. He called shoes "life filled art objects." Have I mentioned? he completes me.

I had never seen a picture of the God of Shoes, so I was a bit surprised to see this little man tooling around Paris on a scooter. But then I realized, he couldn't possibly have lived up to my expectations. No man is Leonidas, Achilles, Hector and Odysseus all rolled into one with a massive helping of shoe perfection. Still, the God of Shoes will always be more than enough man any woman would need. You know, because of the whole completing thing. And the shoes.

This is why Christian Louboutin is the God of Shoes:
I am crying tears of salty purity over those shoes. Those shoes are the cat's meow after good sex and the bees knees after a run through a field of poppies. Those shoes are sublimity in material form and delicousness in satin and bows. Those shoes simply are.

I think we should all launch a thousand paper ships of fabulous in honor of Christian Louboutin.

Today's favorite shoe:

Christian Louboutin, of course.

Liesl, 7N

I saw an old friend yesterday who I hadn't seen in twelve years. He reminded me that I had helped him pick out a suit for his rehearsal dinner and that he still had it, still wears it. His mom told me that they had looked everywhere for a suit that looked good on him and that would last through the fads and were amazed all those years ago that I had been so successful in finding that suit. My husband smiled and said that I've always had sartorial elan. My response? Well, duh.

This is yet another example of why you all should really trust me and my sartorial sense. I have also decided that you sweet things might benefit from my other tastes in all things pretty. Here's your first tip: two words that should never, never, never, never, never, never go together? faux fireplace.

Two other words that should never, never, never, never, never, never go together? Foam shoes.

Today's favorite shoe:

Manolo Blahnik

Liesl, 7N

A friend recently told me a story about a friend of hers. Apparently this friend of a friend bought what she thought was a Dior purse online. When she the lining ripped a year later she took it to Dior to have it fixed. Their response? We don't fix knock offs. Not only did the friend lay out a couple hundred dollars for a knock off, she was duped into thinking it was real, and she was seriously dissed at Dior. I can't imagine a worse fate.

I'm ok with shoe inspirations. I'm ok with buying a pair of shoes from Target that approximately resemble a pair of Manolos. I do not think it is ok, though, to purchase cheap shoes that have a couture label on them. No, I don't care about sweat shops and child labor or fair trade; that's all immaterial in this issue. I care that the original piece of art is being seriously misrepresented. As if Gucci would indulge in plastics.

The moral of this entry is this: if it smells like a knock off, if it looks like a knock off, it costs less than a mortgage payment, it's not worth your time. You have to pay for true art.

You will never find truly fabulous shoes in a trash bag wielded by an Asian man on Canal street.

Today's favorite shoe:

Hollywould "Gertrud"